Bad Dog

It should come as no surprise around here that I’m pretty much a fan of all things dog. I mean, after all, who could resist being a fan of this face?

That said, there is one thing I simply cannot support.

Look, I know it’s a Disney movie, and for that you need to take everything with a grain of salt. But seriously guys, in the words of Dr. Ian Malcolm, this looks like “one big pile of shit.”

Here’s the plot: Drew Barrymore’s pampered highbrow Chihuahua somehow gets lost in Mexico and gets helped by Andy Garcia’s street smart German Shepard to find her way home. George Lopez’s Tramp-to-Barrymore’s-Lady Chihuahua heads off to Mexico to find the girl he loves, aided by humans Piper Perabo, and a guy I’ve never heard of (Manolo Cardona, who, if I’m not mistaken, was named after a shoe), as well as Cheech Marin’s rat, and an iguana.

What?

With that storyline, this movie predictably doesn’t have a bunch of superstars. However, it does have quite a list of second bananas: Barrymore, Lopez, Perabo, Marin, Garcia, Jamie Lee Curtis, Placido Domingo (what?), Edward James Olmos, and Luis Guzman. Did the agents for these guys call up their clients and actually tell them what the movie was about, or did they just say “Hey, Disney movie. You in?” And how did George Lopez feel about playing a Chihuahua? Did he ask if Jackie Chan was in the movie playing a Chow? And how did Cheech Marin feel when he found out he wasn’t playing a Chihuahua, but a rat instead? That’s definitely a step down. The trailer is an abomination consisting of poor plays on words, a song that has little other decipherable words than “Chihuahua,” dogs in clothes, and Drew Barrymore being annoying… which, I have to admit, is par for the course.

So who actually wants to see this movie? Kids? Probably. Adults with no desire to kill themselves? No way. Adults who like to carry their dogs in purses? Definitely.

Me? No thanks. I’d prefer to pay my hard-earned $11 to go see Burn After Reading again.

Bad Dog

5 Responses

  1. hey..ill see burn after reading with you…but…dont judge me if i add the cute dogs talking movie to my netflix queue!
    xoxo

    Too late!

  2. This could have been a much better movie if the story had been about all the chihuahuas banding together and mauling Paris Hilton.

    Hell yeah. I’d pay $11 to go see that. Maybe twice.

  3. Burn After Reading was good? I heard not so much.

    I thought it was hilarious. I was told that a review compared it to a Seinfeld episode in that it was about nothing, but I still laughed a lot.

  4. Burn After Reading is not the best Coen Bros. movie, but is good nevertheless. Very funny.

    I agree, it’s not the best of the Coens, but worth it still.

  5. I agree with you– even my 5 year old nephew thinks the movie looks stupid. Who the heck are they targeting?

    I don’t know either, and I’m certainly not going to pay to find out…

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