Sign Language

I fashion myself as a rather observant individual. I tend to randomly notice when things are off or don’t belong, and I have a keen eye for signs. Take this one inside a 7-11…

Sign Language

In case it isn’t easy to read, it says that those little chicken things are 69 cents a piece, or 5 for $3.45. Now call me crazy but doesn’t $.69 x 5 = $3.45? What kind of deal is that? You could argue that the sign isn’t advertising any sort of deal, but not only would you be an asshole for arguing that, you’d be missing the point that if there’s no deal advertised then there’s no need to tell us how much 5 pieces cost. Why stop at 5? Why not just multiply it out for every possible chicken purchase? 1 for $.69, 2 for $1.38, and so on and so forth?

Moving along, we have this on the wall of McDonald’s…

Sign Language

I know a couple of you will give me shit for going to McDonald’s and to that I say… fuck you all. A highway needs his greasy food fix every now and again. Now look at that picture. Not only is it an Employee of the Month plaque that has no employees on it, it also is from 2007. A quick check of my calendar reveals that it’s 2008, motherfuckers. Just by looking at that I can draw the conclusion that there were no employees good enough to go up there for the entire year of 2007. I can also draw the conclusion that everyone there has sucked so badly that they didn’t even bother putting up a 2008 plaque. This doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence in me so far as that McDonald’s goes.

Sign makers beware. I’m coming for you.

6 Responses

  1. You know I will never give you shit for stopping at a McD’s…I love the Big Mac with the fire of a thousand suns and the egg nog shake makes me weak in the knees. It is the only part of the holiday season I look forward to.

    Mmm… egg nog shake. Well, I know I can’t get that anytime soon, so I guess I’ll have to find me a Cold Stone.

  2. Heh. I love that stuff. My gem was from a few years back where I saw “Marriage Licenses $35.” And right below it: “No refunds on Marriage Licenses” at the Rockville Courthouse.

    Wouldn’t you think that if your engagement fell apart that the last thing you would want would be your $35 back?

    Well, that’s most people. Not me. I’d be there asking for it back. And for me, and those like me, they had to make that sign…grr.

    I didn’t know this was a problem in Rockville. Perhaps I have overestimated the good folk of Maryland all these years…

  3. Nice sleuthing, Goose. Nice sleuthing.

    I have my moments of genius. It’s okay to worship me.

  4. Nothing fixes a hangover like a McD’s double cheeseburger.

    This is true, but as I had no hangover at the time there really is no excuse… except for the simple craving.

  5. Wait wait… McD’s had an egg nog shake?!? Where was I??

    It’s only available during the winter holidays. It’s pretty damn good.

  6. You should ask them about that sign. I would. :)

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