Dear New Flatscreen TV,

I know, you’re waiting for me to pick you up this afternoon. I want to welcome you ahead of time to my humble abode. You’re probably worried about the four-legged critter that is going to be running around, but I assure you he won’t be able to reach you. I want you to know that you will be used to watch the finest HD programming that I can find. Have you seen soccer in HD? Or how about Giada de Laurentiis making love to her food as she eats it in HD? surely those are life-altering images. Additionally you will be used to play Rock Band, because that is what anyone my age should be doing (note to self: have to go back out to Fairfax and pick up Rock Band instruments from old place, and then find space to keep them at new place).

Anyway, I hope you will like it in your new home. Sooner or later you’ll find yourself up on the wall, but for the time being, please enjoy this makeshift TV stand. See you soon!

Dear New Flatscreen TV,

4 Responses

  1. Have you seen Johnny Weir skate to Swan Lake in HD? It’s men’s figure skating heaven!

    Uhh… I’d probably have to be tied to the couch and have my eyelids taped open for that to happen. Every time you say something supporting figure skating I have trouble believing it.

  2. Ha! BTW, i-66, mind emailing me? I need to send you that oink-related Evite but I don’t have your email.

  3. Ok, so you have a new puppy and a new flatscreen… enough bragging. We were envious enough when we saw the puppy! ;-)

  4. have you seen porn in HD???…its enough to make you dream of soft focus analog…

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